Confessions of a Bad Mother

I'm finally done reading this since a few weeks ago. The title of the book actually caught me intrigued though it took me a while to finish the pages. It was a good read anyway, most especially for first time moms like me. Any first time mother or parent can relate to the book, which was written based on a real life experience by the author. I realized that there are same foibles, apprehensions, fear, and disappointments that every mother goes through and these are just probably ordeals that complement the job. These feelings commonly shared do not begin during conception, nor stop after giving birth. Those are the only first stages, and there are just plenty to succeed. My son Miggy is turning two years soon and yes, he is getting to the terrible two stage. Although he is not yet hitting the mark yet, temper tantrums just came into him a little earlier. More each day he is becoming an individual, trying to be independent. Sometimes, I just feel like a bad parent to him when he would throw a fit insisting to get what he wants. Honestly, I have some guilt moments of having been tough to him in the mundane tasks of being a stay-at-home mom and these I would share: • Imposing him to take a nap in the afternoon, and putting him to bed at 9pm even though he still wants to play, read a book and jump on bed. • Depriving him of soda, chocolates and junk food. • Putting him on his chair during meal time though he wants to walk around and play while eating. • Having to wrestle with him when he needs to take his unpalatable vitamins. • Brushing his teeth in the morning & evening while he is struggling and crying on top of his lungs. • Having enrolled him in daycare which caused him to get sickly. • Prohibiting him to run and mess around and letting him sit on his stroller when we are out for malling and shopping. Tough it may seem, no mother would ever wish evil or harm to her child. Different strokes but for only one purpose, and that is to raise our kids the most disciplined way. When they were babies we look forward to their walking and talking, but that presented a new set of challenges, such as falling down-stairs and answering back. When they were toddlers we looked forward to their feeding themselves, and learning to read, but that provoked new challenges such as eating ve-ry slow-ly and whining at us when we turned out the light. At each stage we’ve envisaged a plateu, a resting place where, after a steep climb, the landscape flattens and opens out. What we have to look forward to are just a variety of ever-changing scenarios which we are unable to control or predict. And beyond that, I can see worry: worry abt their going to Burma in their gap year and falling in love with a dissident and going to jail; worry abt their staying here and lying on their beds smoking dope for the rest of their lives; worry about their settling down too young; worry abt their not settling down at all; worry abt their not fulfilling their dreams, not being happy, not being well or getting run over on a road somewhere because at thirty two they still forget to look both ways and look again. Worry abt how they will cope with life when we’re gone. Now I’m worrying abt dying early and leaving them orphaned. Stephanie Calman Author, Confessions of a Bad Mother